How to find a job outside the family business.

Working for a family business comes with pressure. There’s pressure to act a certain way. There’s pressure to perform at a certain level. There’s pressure to do what other employees in the company might not have to do. There’s pressure to meet (sometimes) unfair expectations. There’s pressure to take on more responsibility than you might be comfortable with. And it’s usually under the agreement that you get certain advantages you wouldn’t get outside the family business.

It’s all part of working in the family business.

But what happens when you realize the family business might not be right for you?

Some people come to this decision naturally and are called to do some other type of work outside of the family business. Today we call this ‘passion’.

For all those others of us out there who don’t have this so-called ‘passion’, this part of your life will be challenging.

And that’s ok. This is the majority of us. 

Without a calling or a passion guiding your life, the family business probably served as a safe place. A place where you knew how things worked. A place where you were protected from failure. A place where you could collect a paycheck and maybe even enjoy benefits you wouldn’t be privy to were you not related to the owner of the company.

This was my problem, anyway.

Since most of my adolescent years were spent in and around the family business, I’d decided early in life that I wanted to work for the business when I was old enough. 

I spent no time considering alternative paths. 

“Why waste my time elsewhere when I have this opportunity at my fingertips?” I thought.

So as soon as I graduated college, that’s what I did. It took quite some time before I admitted to myself that I didn’t want to work for my family’s senior care business.  

Unfortunately, as sure as I was that I didn’t want to work there, I was less certain of what I did want to do.

Overwhelmed, I stayed stuck.

I stayed stuck in that state of decision paralysis for most of my mid to late twenties.

My situation ailed me so much that I sought professional help.

This remains one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. 

But I’m not going to tell you to do that. 

I won’t dissuade you from seeking professional advice, by the way. The hours I spent speaking with this unbiased third party were tremendous. They were validating, empowering, motivating, and all of the other ‘-ings’ you’d expect from a person who is genuinely interested in helping you.

Rather, I suggest, if leaving your family’s business is your primary goal, that you define what you currently do in your family business. Or, if you dread what you currently do, choose the role you were most satisfied with. 

From there, find that specific role (or as close to it as possible) in other companies, and start applying to those jobs. 

These companies will reach out. And as long as you can actually do what you told them you’ve done, they’ll hire you. 

Pretty simple, right?

I know. And this is exactly what I did and what I came up with after all those years of anguish.

This likely won’t solve all of your problems but obtaining a job outside of your family business will tell you if indeed it was your family’s business that you were so dissatisfied with or if you have more work to do. 

Chances are, you do.

But we can talk about that another day.