Tums.

Today at work, a guest asked my friend Anton for some Tums. 

Anton is from Germany but has lived in the U.S. for the last year or so. It’s a shock really that he’s so well adjusted to American life being that he’s only lived here for a little over a year. What he’s accomplished in a year, it seems, would take me at least 25 if I were to try to do it in Germany. But apparently as much as he knows about American life, he’d yet to learn about Tums.

So when the guest asked Anton about them, he was clueless. And, for whatever reason, concluded that the guest was asking him if he could find her a tampon. Bashfully, he said no. Then, only after sharing his embarrassment with another co-worker did he learn what the guest was looking for when she asked for Tums. He promptly brought them to her and apologized for the misunderstanding. 

Later in the night, a guy who works at the bar walked up to one of the managers and said, “I know this is strange but one of the guests in the lounge just asked me if we have any Tums. Do you know if we have any?”

Before the manager could respond, I interjected, “Go ask Anton. He can help you.”  

And off he went, in search of Anton, to ask him about Tums for the second time in his life.